Gran Turismo

(excerpt from my journal entry dated June 18, 2012, a Monday)

I was channel surfing last night and chanced upon TV5 (a French cable channel), and I happened to see a group of hill-like buildings along a rocky coast on the Mediterranean. The buildings were bright white and were structured in such a way that reminded me of the Hanging Gardens of ancient Babylon.

It was a feature on Nice, one of the luxury destinations in Europe. It’s amazing, really, how the rich throw their money away just to pursue their fairy tale bliss. Those villas are just…I don’t know…enchanting, straight out of fairy tale books.

It’s funny, though, the way the narrator handled the voice-over commentary. She’s simply irreverent. The tour guide of their ferry, she described as a “chatterbox.” And when they came upon a small island somewhat connected to the mainland by a small strip of land, our narrator said that the island used to belong to this very old family who later sold it to U2 vocalist Bono, about whom she commented: “It just goes to show how a lot of money can make people dotty.” Dotty? I looked it up in the dictionary, and there it says “dotty” means “crazy, eccentric, etc.”

When the feature was almost over, our narrator then remarked that pagkatapos daw maglaway ng mga turista sa karangyaang nakita nila [translation mine], it was up to (name of tour guide) to bring the tourists back on firm ground. How candid that was!

I wondered what she has to say if ever she does a feature on the Philippines. I mean there are those of us who seem so eager to hear what English-speaking people have to say about this country. Candid as they are, the French probably have a lot to say, too, and then being the way they are, I’m pretty sure they’d have the flair with words. Ahehe.

Quite frankly, it is getting tiresome to be reacting all the time or to be concern all the time about how white people think of us. It’s not like we can gag them up or censor whatever negative things they have to say. Duh.

After that feature, it turned out that it was just one segment of a show, somewhat like the French version of our “Unang Hirit,” except that their features are more well-researched, -written and -produced.

I guess I was watching a replay. It was carnival time then, and I thought carnival time is always around Mardi Gras (Fat Tuesday), the Tuesday before Ash Wednesday. But then, I could be wrong.

Cannes Film Festival

Next feature was the Cannes Film Festival. Before this, I didn’t know that that festival is held somewhere by the sea. Onlookers who’d like to see their favorite stars walking the red carpet can do so by getting on one of the boats or ships that were stationed by the sea then. There’s even a contest of some sort as to which ship has the best view of the festival.

There were coastguards patrolling the sea among the ships, trying to maintain peace and order. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a “UFO” appeared, although the “UFO” (so says the video narrator) was clearly identifiable. It was a man who probably just wanted his 15 minutes of fame, said the narrator. The man was in a wet suit, with two large hoses attached to his flanks connecting him to this floating device behind him. Water blows from the ends of the hoses, keeping him hoisted up in the air. The coastguards chased after him, and then admonished him not to disturb the business by the shore.

And then there was this “island”—a floating “plot” on which there were a house, some parasols, fake trees, etc. A local fisherman observed that such “islands” used to be bigger, but this one is much smaller. I don’t know if he was complaining. Whatever he was talking about, he lost me.

Venice

After that segment, the next feature was on Venice, Italy. Mainly, the story was about how Venetians are getting “choked” out of their lives by the overwhelming effects of their tourism industry.

A Venetian old-timer served as the feature’s guide. He walked around the city, showing shops that sell items that “tourists want, but Venetians don’t need.” One such shop sells Venetian masks for the Carnival, and—guess what?—they’re all made in China! Wtf! Ahehe.

Stores that used to sell fruits and vegetables have now been converted to fruit/veggie stands-cum-tourist gift shops. Our old-timer guide went to one such shop and asked the owner, how come the fruits/veggies section of the store has gone smaller than the gifts/souvenirs section? And the man answered, “I’ll tell you why, but not in front of the camera.” That was very smart.

It turned out, Venice is selling out its historical buildings to corporations to be converted into hotels, casinos(?), etc. The locals, of course, are complaining. There are just 60,000 citizens in the city, compared to 20 million tourists!

A Venetian woman said that most Venetians nowadays avoid going to St. Mark’s Square around February for the masquerade. It’s filled with tourists and they feel resentful that their government is milking the opportunity to the last drop.

I’m wondering, if ever I’m to visit Venice, I’d probably do it in December, which is the lowest off season for tourists, during which time, the walkways are almost deserted. I just want to see Titians, Tintorettos, Canalettos, etc. And yes, the buildings, too. But for the carnival? No, I don’t think so. I’m introverted, remember?

The feature ends with some Venetians lined up along the banks of the main canal, holding up a very large banner for all those on the big ships entering the canal to see. “BIG SHIPS…YOU KILL ME!” their banner reads. They claim that the big ships entering the canal have adverse effects on the banks—although I’m not sure if I understood it right.

At a signal, they all raise their arms up at the big ships in the canal, and then they wave about their middle fingers. Ahehe. I sometimes wish I can do that to some unwelcome tourists in this country.

La Lanterna, Trieste

Next stop is Trieste, another Italian destination. There’s a beach resort there called “La Lanterna,” where the lovers go to be separated from each other. Literally. There’s a wall that divides/separates the men from the women on the beach.

Both the men and women who frequent the beach find the separation to their liking. The women say they can do whatever they want without worrying about the men scrutinizing their legs or breasts or the fat on their bodies. Same thing with the men on the men’s side. It’s a festival of beer bellies on their side of the wall—they lie there on the sand like albino sea lions.

One man was asked, “Do you think about your wife while here?” He answers, “No,” and then he laughs. The men say they enjoy the peace and quiet, without the women nagging at them. True enough, it seemed more peaceful on the men’s side. On the women’s side, the women chatter a lot. Yet they say that, away from the men, they are there for the peace and quiet also. Go figure. Ahehe.

The wall that separates the two was built in 1903. It’s become a tradition since then. People say it was erected to protect the women and blossoming girls from the lewdness of the men. But for the men, the wall is also a symbol of a rite of passage. Boys younger than 12 stay with their mothers on the women’s side. At 12, they transfer to the men’s side.

There was once a move to tear down the wall. Of course, it was met with opposition. There would be a revolution, the people said. Tear down the Berlin wall, but not this one, they added. One woman said, “If they tear down this wall, I will go away.” For the women, the wall accounts for the strength in character of Triestian women. Even without their men around, they say they are strong.

It’s really a good thing that I saw this show on TV5. It’s more satisfying, really, than just getting your info from the more popular travel shows all the time.